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Monday, June 18, 2012

My House Ate My Remote...Again

We are now going on day 7 of our TV being stuck on the Disney channel.

 We lost the remote. Cue impending doom music. 

Actually, we have now lost two remotes. Yep. This has happened before. Lost remote, couldn't take it being stuck on one channel, and purchased a new one. Then...we found the old one. Of course.

Now, because we are so awesome, we can not find EITHER remote.

Seriously...where could they be? I may not have a home that can be featured in the newest edition of Better Home and Gardens, but we are not flippin' hoarders! So...I've eliminated that picture of several remotes lost under trash, boxes, and 30 cats out of your minds, right? 

I think Remote #1 was actually hidden after Remote #2 was purchased so we would have a back up. Great plan idiots. We should know we aren't smart enough to remember where we hid something over a year ago. Cripes. We don't even have a good track record of remembering where all of the Easter Eggs are. We learned a hard lesson one year to ONLY hide the plastic eggs.... 

Tonight, after the same stupid "tween" show came on during my evening laundry folding extravaganza, I finally couldn't take it anymore. I started tearing cushions off of the couches. When it didn't appear that the couch had ingested either of the remotes, I turned into the Incredible Hulk and started moving furniture frantically. I was red faced, sweaty, and my hair was all crazy.

This, my friends, is quite possibly what rock bottom might look like.

 In fact, I think I am more embarrassed that this is my reaction to not having a REMOTE. A simple device that changes channels on a television. The crazy reaction that I had might be more appropriate for, oh...I don't know...a fricken crack addict? Sheesh.

Needless to say, I did not find either of the remotes. I interrogated the kids under a hot lamp and they did not have information that was useful in any way. But then again, why would they? They are in heaven. The TV is stuck on the Disney channel forever. I can actually picture Sassy Girl praying for this. Would not surprise me. 

I will be taking the walk of shame back into the cable company tomorrow.

"Another remote please. Just put it on my tab."

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