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Saturday, May 26, 2012

Whatcha Gonna Do When They Come For You?

I got pulled over last night. 2 am after a Captain May I show. I have been waiting for this to happen.

When I pictured it happening previous nights I imagined myself being extremely confident knowing that I had not broken any laws.  Making up for my years of rebellious youth when getting pulled over meant one of your friends was going to jail.  I guess a cockiness came out in me. In my head.

This was not the case though. The minute those red lights started flashing I pulled over and took a look in the rear view mirror. First of all I had been dancing for 3 hours straight so smeared eyeliner and sweaty disheveled hair never bodes well for pleading your case of sobriety. It was 2 am so I might as well have been drunk. Thoughts were not very coherent in my sleep deprived mind.

I reached in the back for my purse to get my wallet...half expecting the officer to see me shuffling and get on a megaphone and shout for me to "Get my hands up!" They don't really use mega phones...do they? 

That did not happen. That would have sucked. My sister and I nearly had a panic attack getting frisked at the airport. A cliche aggressive cop statement would have definitely got the waterworks flowing. 

My hands are shaking. I am trying to decipher WHY I am so nervous. No reason. Where did my cocky alter ego go? It abandoned me and now here I sit shaking and clammy like I am about to get caught with heroin or prostitutes. (?)

I hand my license over to the cop who does his strut up to my window. Think about nervously cracking a joke about ordering fries and a shake...but wisely decide against it.

He tells me he pulled me over because my headlights were not on.

Anxiety turns into embarrassment. I'm a dumbass.

It all comes flooding back. I was dropping my sister off and we had to have one of our ADD conversations that takes 20 minutes to talk about a 30 second topic. I shut my lights off in a streetlight lit parking lot because I realized I was stupidly shining my lights into some poor old person's house while they were trying to sleep.

And I then I just...drove away. And got pulled over. And got a warning. Written warning.

Is this warning going to affect future job endeavors?

 Like we don't hire felons.

Felons or Dumbasses.




1 comment:

  1. No matter if you have done nothing wrong, being pulled over is nerve wracking. In my wild teen days I got pulled over at 3 in the am with two friends on the back of my scooter, all three no helmets. Till today I don't know how I managed to sweet talk the cop, instead of being arrested we got a verbal warning.

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